I’m PHAT!!!
Pretty • Hot • and • Tempting.
“because that’s what beauty is supposed to be.
..nowadays..”
I stared at my body in disdain.
Pardon my French. I felt fat.
Like my body was sending out a bad report card
Of how I had been treating it.
I don’t mean to offend those who have,
But I have not been like this since birth.
It feels like I’m in a new skin
Trying to adjust to this new weight.
Of course my panic mode is to Lose it!!
Cardio. Keto. Vegan.
Or wait, I can adjust it!!
Waist train. Detox. Surgery.
Anything to shed off this new skin. New weight.
Make it fit the mold I desperately fought to enter.
Woman!
Heavy. Thick. Curvy.
Woman!
Light. Thin. Still Curvy.
“because that’s what beauty is supposed to be.
..nowadays..”
Beauty is in pounds of flesh in the ‘right’ places
For she is not beautiful, one who is not desired by a man
The many, the more beautiful.
Tragic. How skewed this perception is!
Forcing many a youngin’ into body image pits.
I cannot state this enough!
How unfair I have been to my body.
Confining its purpose to a bed. a stage. a nude.
I have not served my body right.
Not respected it enough.
I have not fed it right. Granted.
But I have not respected it more.
It is worth so much more than an image.
Than a desire. Than a societal mold.
My body is beautiful. In whatever stage.
In whatever skin. In whatever weight.
It has been said that beauty lies within.
But what determines what’s within.
What is this within??
Who determines the beauty construct of our bodies?
Who decides at what weight it’s okay to love my body?
Who decides what to feed it?. How to care for it?.
Who speaks for my body?
If it had a voice what will be its first words??
What will your body say to you, dear lady??
Are you forcing it to fit a certain goal of perfect proportion?
Are you scraping melanin to take better pictures?
Are you nurturing it because of love or obligation?
Are you speaking disapproval about the way it is daily?
Beauty does come from within.
From your heart, speak the truth unto your body.
The truth about how intricately designed you are.
How wonderfully the Greatest Craftsman put you together.
Let the truth come from within to bathe your skin.
Let it overflow to your daughters and everyone alike.
When you love someone, you treat them right.
It’s not the other way round.
So let me say it again
You don’t beat your body
into a certain frame before you can love it.
If you do, please permit me to speak for your body;
Loudly, surely it says :
You’ll never be satisfied with me.
I’m still staring at my body
But not in disdain.
I understand it will go through some changes.
But come what may, I choose to serve it right with love.
For it’s the Temple God gave me for now.
I’m not what you say I am
I don’t give you permission to have access
With your words of disapproval.
Beauty is supposed to be exactly what God gave me.
Perfect • Healthy • and • True.
~ sheyla