Escapism

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Escapism

I just had a bout of mini depression

Let me explain the process

There’s a trigger, usually something insignificant;

  • your friend misspoke
  • relationship issue
  • you compared your instagram feed to someone you adore and felt like trash
  • Cramps.
  • things at work didn’t go as planned
  • a family member needs money you don’t have.
  • wrong use of social media
  • spiritual guilt (you didn’t do what the church says God expects of you)
  • definitely more cramps

These small insignificant emotions are transferred to your brain by neurotransmitters of low self esteem

…and here come the tears !!

followed by this big bubble of really nothing, but everything at the same time.

…and here come the voices, of the most mundane descriptions a person can make about himself.. the ‘you’re no good’ , ‘look at your life’ voices so freaking loud.

…and here comes the exhaustion, leading to desire your normal bout of escapism:_ maybe wine.  Or sex. Or mybet. Work. Cigarettes. YouTube. Junk food.                                   Sleeping it over_ whatever was the upset.

I call it escapism, and everyone has their secret dungeon.

Escapism is a grown man at the club. Shoulders crouched over a glass of rum Wedding ring on the counter                           Keys to the side as though he was mimicking the current state of mind.              Responsibilities weighing him down.       Alcohol draining him                                   Turning his mind over to the teen winding away her cares in the shadows of music.         He yearns for her….

She yearns for him- the one called freedom   Running away from the prison of tears in her room. Bills to pay, outfit to slay                   Failed relationships on replay                         She came to dance it all away                          Just maybe, through the crevices of fun        The pain in her skin may just slip away           She meets his eyes and some sparks fly.        The rest is history

Their bodies meet after the flirting of their minds                                                   Introduction. Of their bodies and not their stories.

The morning after is silent                          Because his wife is calling                                 and Her tears are beckoning                             The escape route was wrong.                           They will try again.                                           Take another route in the evening. 

 

Escapism won’t solve the problem.  It will mask it for awhile, and drive you into deeper muds

I just had a bout of mini-depression                 An insignificant issue blown terribly out of proportion. But this time I chose not to go the route of escapism.

The issue is still there

But I’m breathing lightly…Taking my time..Seeing it in perspective.

I come to the conclusion;

However cliché, a bad day doesn’t equal a bad life. Don’t speak negatives into your existence It’s not the truth. Isolate the issues and tackle them logically. After letting time put all the emotions attached to the side, you’ll most likely find a ready solution for the problem.

And if you don’t, it’s okay                                 Just keep going.. keep living                           Some problems are meant only for Jesus to handle. Hand them over. Wipe the tears       Toss the frustration blanket

And LIVE!!! 

…the clock never stops ticking… 

-sheyla- 

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